Grief Is Love: Living with Loss

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The melody that the loved one played upon the piano of your life will never be played quite that way again, but we must not close the keyboard and allow the instrument to gather dust. We must seek out other artists of the spirit, new friends who gradually will help us to find the road to life again, who will walk the road with us.” ― Joshua Loth Liebman Other days, it is almost manageable; life continues; we get caught up; our pain almost fleeting. A gentle wave comes to the surface when we are hit with a memory or a reminder of our loved one. We slowly learn to tread water, working to keep our head above water. Inertia. But we get through. The day passes. Much like the waves in the ocean, our pain is fluctuating. Anger or hostility. Losing somebody is painful and can seem an unfair thing to happen. You may find that you feel angry or frustrated and want to find something or someone to blame for the loss, so that you can try to make sense of it.

Grief is Love with No Place to Go - Mindful Grief is Love with No Place to Go - Mindful

But that doesn’t mean we give up or don’t try. Most of us will reach out to a friend or family member dealing with a loss. It’s our instinct to try and comfort them during such a terrible time. Or maybe you found the perfect quote for someone you know who is struggling after the death of a loved one. Every time we make the decision to love someone, we open ourselves to great suffering, because those we most love cause us not only great joy but also great pain. The greatest pain comes from leaving…the pain of the leaving can tear us apart. Still, if we want to avoid the suffering of leaving, we will never experience the joy of loving. And love is stronger than fear, life stronger than death, hope stronger than despair. We have to trust that the risk of loving is always worth taking.” — Henri Nouwen

4. Grief is a conversation of hearts.

Yearning is an emotional state widely experienced in situations involving loss, focused on a desire for a person, place, or thing that was treasured in the past.” O’Connor and Sussman (2014) The Language of Love and Loss There’s an invisible thread connecting your heart to all hearts, you to all life. Grief is a heavy weight to carry and it's also an anchor in love. It's not something you can rush or push past. It feels so like fear that it's hard to see how it can leave room for love.

Behind the Veil of Grief | Psychology Today

Read on, and we think you might benefit from this collection of wise and timeless words. Quotes for Those Who Grieve The more we love the more we lose. The more we lose the more we learn. The more we learn the more we love. It comes full circle. Life is the school, love is the lesson. We cannot lose.” ― Kate McGahan No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing.”

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guilt – for example, guilt about feeling angry, about something you said or did not say, or not being able to stop your loved one dying

Grief Quotes To Ease Sorrow and Show Love - Live Bold and 67 Grief Quotes To Ease Sorrow and Show Love - Live Bold and

They that love beyond the world cannot be separated by it. Death cannot kill what never dies. Nor can spirits ever be divided, that love and live in the same divine principle, the root and record of their friendship. If absence be not death, neither is theirs. Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still. For they must needs be present, that love and live in that which is omnipresent. In this divine glass they see face to face; and their converse is free, as well as pure. This is the comfort of friends, that though they may be said to die, yet their friendship and society are, in the best sense, ever present, because immortal.” ― William Penn Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said. A child or a book or a painting or a house or a wall built or a pair of shoes made. Or a garden planted. Something your hand touched some way so your soul has somewhere to go when you die, and when people look at that tree or that flower you planted, you’re there.” ― Ray BradburyI remember talking about my dad to a friend—how he was an incredible doctor, always put his family first, was loved by his friends, and celebrated the beauty of every single day despite its imperfections. She looked at me and said, “You know, he may have lived a short life. But he lived a whole life.” Grief may be so intense that you just want to withdraw or isolate yourself. Take time for yourself, yes, however, lean on those around you. Get involved in something - volunteer or set a project. Getting involved in work or some other activity you enjoy can keep you focused and offer a welcome distraction from your grief. If that activity is especially meaningful or helpful to others, you might find it also raises your spirits and strengthens your sense of purpose. Implore lifestyle changes The pain of grief can often cause you to want to withdraw from others and retreat into your shell. But having the face-to-face support of other people is vital to healing from loss. Even if you're not comfortable talking about your feelings under normal circumstances, it's important to express them when you're grieving.

the Five Stages of Grief Can Help Process a Loss How the Five Stages of Grief Can Help Process a Loss

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love. – Washington Irving You see, love and grief are two sides of the same precious coin. One does not—and cannot—exist without the other. They are the yin and yang of our lives… Grief is predicated on our capacity to give and receive love. Some people choose not to love and so never grieve. If we allow ourselves the grace that comes with love, however, we must allow ourselves the grace that is required to mourn.” – Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph. D.

The Queen

Touching poems about grief and bereavement are a great way to find the words and feelings you may have been struggling to express. So try the range of grief poems below. She was left to look after the Kennedys’ young children on her own, and you can see the proud mother gently instructing three-year-old John Jr to salute his father’s passing coffin in poignant footage of John F. Kennedy’s funeral . Yet grievers themselves articulate this same sentiment often - that grief is love. I have been thinking a lot lately about how love and grief, it isn't just a one-for-one exchange. It isn't that the exact same love we had for someone who was once living now transforms into the grief we have for them once they're gone. They consumed a space in our lives, they left a gaping hole, but grief feels somehow immensely bigger and greater than simply the hole. I think that might be why grievers talk about the relationship between love and grief in a different way than those offering banalities. The Presence of Absence Grief is unpredictable. You milk the good days and then do whatever you must to get through the bad ones. And you find the helpers. They will assist you in ways you can’t imagine and don’t expect. They can be your loved ones, your family members, your neighbors, your colleagues, people from your church or temple congregation, or even total strangers. Whatever hardship you’re going through, you can’t get through it alone. Take these words and make them your own as you journal, compose an epitaph, engrave an inscription, or describe your love and sorrow to a counselor or dear friend. Quotes on Grief for Those Providing Comfort